The Chicken Drama

Dear KFC,

As a Kentucky fried chicken eater, I would like to point out a couple of matters on the service level at one of your outlets.

It was a cold night and I was hungry. So, I decided to go to your outlet to buy a Variety Bucket and also to stock up on my stash of caffeine (Nescafe) at Giant. But the latter point isn't really relevant, but then again, come to think of it, it IS relevant (as shall be demonstrated later).

So, when I entered your outlet, I saw that there were 4 counters open for operation. Each counter had about 4 person lining up then. So, me being a really random and yet logical person, I decided to do a little mental math + stereotyping + wild guessing at the people waiting in line. I ended up lining up at the 2nd queue from the left.

That time was 9:25pm. [See how loyal I am? There was McD just across the road, but I decided to go to you instead].

The 1st lady lining up then was still looking at the menu and contemplating as to what to eat [obviously being very inconsiderate towards the hungry people lining up behind her, for one- me!]. But obviously that's out of your control, so I understand and shall not blame you for that. However, your staff manning the counter was all gay and welcoming and decided to wait with her. Can you imagine? The lady took 5 minutes to utter out what she wanted, AND your staff was an accomplice who took away 5 minutes of our lives.

OK after she had decided, here comes the horror. Nope, not cockroaches, but worse. Your staff was busy scrambling and running around looking for god-knows-what.

So, yeah, after the 4th person, it was already 9:55pm. Can you imagine? It took you 30 minutes to serve 4 people!! Wow, at the rate you're going and if you're not profiting exorbitantly from the Zinger Tower, you must not be making a lot of money. At that time, the 3 other people lining up behind me was already starting to mutter out curse words and sighing and shaking their heads. Oh thank God none of them took out a gun (or a parang in the Malaysian context) and started killing everyone at the scene. Seriously, in America, these things happen.

So, yea, it came my turn, and oh yeah, remember the statement above about the relevance of the caffeine stash story? I shall tell you the relevance now. My brother, who was lining up at Giant paying for my Nescafe the same time when I started waiting for your chickens (had 15 people queueing up in front of him) and he came back when I was just about to order my chickens. Hmm, kinda ironic huh? You figure it out yourself.

Anyway, came my turn. So I told him straight up. "Hi. Take-away. Variety Bucket. That's all". I saved everyone else the misery of "Hi, Selamat datang ke KFC. Apa yang boleh saya bantu?" [See how many syllables there are in that line?].

I looked at the display monitor which said "Hi. Nama saya Hanisah". I was thinking, "Man, Hanisah must be on some sick leave and they asked this poor trainee to take over her place". Anyway, this dude must be so new to the game that he didn't know which button to press on the cashier. So, he asked this other lady on the 1st counter, "Kak, Variety Bucket yang mana ah?". I rolled my eyes and gritted my teeth.

So, that took away 30 seconds of my life. After he had punched in the button, he scrambled to look for the chickens and everything else the Bucket is supposed to have. See, I'm usually a very patient person, but this was really pushing my limits. I could tell that he has no clue what the Variety Bucket is supposed to have, cuz he kept looking at the big-ass menu on top of him.

3 pieces of Original chicken
3 pieces of Hot & Spicy chicken
1 (L) Nuggets
1 (R) Wedges
2 whipped potato

Not rocket science. How did I memorise that? Staring at the big-ass menu myself for 10 minutes while waiting for him to fill up the bucket kinda helps me to memorize.

Oh, apparently the nuggets are still frying. So, he came back to me and gave me a paper cup, with the bottom written "6" [yeah, that's my waiting number and I was told to wait for 5 minutes].

So I paid him and he asked, "Ada apa lagi yang boleh saya bantu?" I was tempted to say, "Yeah, shoot me and then go shoot yourself".

I took my almost-full Bucket and went to the seats and waited with my brother [who by that time had already engaged in a 20-minute phone conversation]. After waiting for 5 minutes as instructed, I took the paper cup back to the counter to "Hanisah" and gave my "WTF look" and showed him the "6".

He completely ignored me, as though I was invisible and continued to run around scrambling for more chickens.

So, finally after 3 minutes, he noticed me! Yay!! Hallelujah!!

He scrambled again and screamed, "Large nuggets dah siap belum?"

Yeah, 2 minutes later it was siap-ed. I took the nuggets and asked him for sauce and serviettes. He grabbed a bunch and handed them to me. I was like, "Where am I supposed to keep these? In my Doraemon pocket? Give me a plastic bag for Goodness' sake!"

He got the idea and dumped everything in a plastic bag and gave to me. I grabbed it and headed for the door, cuz it was already 10:15pm.

Now, KFC, you tell me what was wrong in the picture above and how can you improve it?

Wow, MBB, I'm impressed.

Ever since I got that letter from Maxis Broadband informing me that I have been "upgraded" from a 100mbps to 200mbps connection, I have always been curious....








as to why my internet connection is so friking fast!!

Seriously, it's even faster than a 200mbps. I would know cuz I have worked on a 1gbps line before. So, I was doing a little confirmation on my side. I went to the Start menu, then to Connections, and this sight nearly made me fall off my chair.




Wow. Period.

V-Day Flash Mob

Yessssss, the moment you have all been waiting for. The unveiling of the full details of the Valentine's Day Flash Mob (VFM). However, I shall not reveal much until the details have all been worked out.

Date: Feb 7, 2010
Day: Sunday
Time: 4pm (actual event), 2pm (briefing, trial run)
Location: To be determined
Participants: All ages, CausePlay is looking for beatboxers (minimum 15) and dancers (minimum 20 dancers made up of 10 couples)
Routine: Hip-hop dance, emboying the V-Day theme.

So, in the meantime, start RSVP-ing and spreading the word around.

Cheers,
CausePlay

CFM: The video everyone has been waiting for

OK here we go. Key takeaways:

1. Yes, the echo from the train was fking loud. So, I would give props to the beatboxers and singers for making it work. You guys rocked!

2. Yes, we only had 1 cameraman. Yeah, it goes back to the whole thing of ppl ffk-ing us during the last minute. Lesson learnt. What goes around comes around. We wished that we had more volunteers who could help us shoot the flash mob from different angles, so that you could actually see the reactions, smiles and "wow" coming from the passengers. Sometimes, you need to be present physically to be able to experience the "WOW" factor. Take for example, it's exactly like watching Avatar on DVD. That's just sad man.

3. Thanks again to everyone who participated! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2010!

Euphoria: Christmas Flash Mob

So, the Christmas Flash Mob (CFM) was on Dec 20th, Sunday at Putra LRT. 2 words to describe it, "Fking awesome".

A couple of notes to those who ffk us during the last minute: Thanks for not coming (I mean it seriously and sarcastically). You know why? I'll tell you why. It was indeed a blessing in disguise because we couldn't have managed the logistics when we were beatboxing and singing inside the train. It would be too big of a gob to move about (if you know what I'm saying). So, yea, thanks again for not coming and blowing us off last minute. What goes around, comes around.

OK, now I shall begin deciphering the euphoria of the CFM. I'll tell you why it was so "Fking awesome":
1. It was the first ever in Malaysia and I'm pretty sure it was the first ever in the world. For those of you who are thinking of challenging this statement, pls try your very best to search for videos of a group of people "flash mobbing" public transportations while singing AND beatboxing.

2. We totally rocked it even though 15 of us showed up (vs initial target of 30). Like I mentioned above, logistics would have been tougher to co-ordinate. And if you think that beatboxing and singing in the train is easy, you are damn wrong. Imagine having to beatbox for 6 whole minutes continuously while moving from 1 tram to the next and having to balance yourself standing and trying to outdo the noise caused by the echo of the train moving through the underground tunnnel. If you think you can do it, show us what you got. As for the singers, since there was limited number of singers, we had to also outdo the noise caused by the echo. Oh, not forgetting also to keep check of the stations that we had to get out at. Otherwise, we would be ending up in Gombak or something.

3. We definitely brought a whole new meaning to flash mob, whereby long gone are the days where people just imitate whatever that ImprovEverywhere is doing (freezing, doing some train party, pillow fights, etc). CausePlay combined beatboxing and singing this time around. The next flash mob would be even bigger and better. If you wanna be part of it, you know who to contact.

4. The participants were not just young, but they were talented as well. Did I mention that they were very sporting as well? Props and kudos to the beatboxers, all ranging from 16 to 20. You amazed me and the hundreds of Malaysian LRT passengers who can testify to that. You showcased your talent and you were not afraid or shy to show the world what you got. A typical Malaysian would just stand by and watch and go "oooo" and "ahhh".

5. The reactions from the LRT passengers was something that money can NEVER buy. All the uncles and aunties who have obviously never seen people beatboxing turned to look, teen couples smiled and sang along with us, youngsters took out their cameras and videocams (for those who were carrying it there and then) and started recording. A couple of foreigners even wished us Merry Christmas after the CFM. Like I said, P R I C E L E S S (kinda like the MasterCard advertisement).

6. There were no rehearsals done. We only gathered 2 hours earlier to conduct the briefing and did a trial run before the CFM. Obviously, people have come from all over the place and we didn't wanna take up too much of their time. A beatboxer even came all the way from Malacca and another singer looked us up (instead of being invited to the event). Kudos!


Once again, a MASSIVE shoutout goes out to:
BEATBOXERS
Kimsng: For being the right-hand person for the CFM, key female beatboxer [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/profile.php?id=629197000&ref=ts]

ABeatC: For being the show-starter and also the lead male beatboxer. Oh, not forgetting video editor [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/profile.php?id=1029405567&ref=ts]

Koujee: For also being the lead male beatboxer and for providing the "enthusiasm" and "humour" to the group [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/profile.php?id=100000421152230&ref=ts]

Danil: Muhibah pilot boy, who also happens to beatbox [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/profile.php?id=714195620&ref=ts]

MC Rave: Cool dude, thanks for showing up man [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/profile.php?id=1362886079&ref=ts]

M3: Another cool dude, thanks for showing up [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/megatdanial?ref=ts]

Ice: "Hi, I'm Ice" "Hi, I'm Fire" All the way from Melaka, beatboxing for the fellow KL-ians [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/AisBatu?ref=ts]

Bei: Another female beatboxer. Arigato! [http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/bbbei?ref=mf]

SINGERS
Keith: TQ for being so proactive. Look forward to your participation next round ;)
Peggy: Yes, we all know the long working hours ;) But, I'm sure you can still spend time to come and join us for the next flash mob
Psych majors: Jasmine, Felix and Cheong
Lee Yee: Bei's twin sister! Who can always throw in some beats! You go girl ;)

CAMERAMAN
Yow Fung in da house!! People thought you were shooting some film/movie :p

Do look out for the video. Will post it soon (once it's done being edited).

Cheers,
CausePlay

Loud ppl

I have lots of pet peeves. I cannot take it when there are slow drivers in front of me (when they drive like they're cruising on the road like it's some Sunday evening), too much wasabi (that's when there's this very pungent strong sensation at the back of your medulla oblongata), a person who has really bad breath (ewwww) and many other things.

However, another 2 things that I cannot take are when:

(A) a person is loud. And when I say loud, it means that whenever this person talks, you can hear him/her (although you're trying very very hard to focus on whatever it is that you're doing). Loud also means that whenever this person talks, you just feel like taking whatever it is that you're wearing on your feet (the smellier, the better) and throwing it at his/her face.

(B) when this loud person cannot speak English. Seriously man, all you can hear is "ching chong chang zing yo mo ma" (FYI- I understand and can speak the Chinese Language just fine. So, don't tell me that I'm being inconsiderate when I'm being the exact opposite).

So, let me take you back to 2 mornings ago. I woke up 30 min earlier than usual cuz I had some office work to do. So ok fine, I took the earlier train, hoping and praying and knowing pretty well that the crowd that takes the early train are usually "quiet" (cuz they would be just like me, waking up early and "redeeming" the lost sleep by napping in the train).

There I was, napping peacefully until the train stopped at BTS station.

Came in this Chinese lady and her bf/husband/companian/soulmate/better-half. When she started talking, all hell just broke loose.

Woman: ni ching chong chang ching song mo ma (FYI- I'm just making up all these words cuz I couldn't be bothered to be listening to her talk)

After 2 seconds....

Woman: mo so dang ding diu ler li la ma nong..........

After 2 seconds.........

Woman: leh li loh yu tha hue het fong fang fing fong

OH EM GEE!!!!

I really beh tahan (that's what Hokkiens say when they can't take it anymore). When I opened my eyes to see the face of the person that was making all the ruckus, I saw her. Standing 1 metre away from me, leaning against the railing, hands on her luggage handle, arms holding on to some fur coat (poor animals) and big hair, heavy makeup and no English (and obviously no courtesy as well).

Everyone was already awake by then. Obviously, they looked irritated and annoyed cuz someone stole away their napping time. Seriously, for workslaves like us, SLEEP is a very important word and activity. So important til we sometimes put sleep as our hobby and interests. Talk about being deprived.

Anyway, back to this woman. She kept talking and talking and talking as though there was no tomorrow (speaking of which, I need to go and watch 2012). Her bf just nodded and mumbled a few words, while sheepishly looking at the irritated passengers (me!) and offering an apologetic smile.

Finally, after 15 minutes of torture (trust me, 15 minutes is a LONG time), we arrived at KL Sentral. Peace and quiet at last.

As she was walking out of the train, I noticed her boots. Guess what made me laugh?

Around the boots, there were words plastered around. And they said, "NIU BAO".

Indeed, Made in China.

I would have loved to take a picture to prove my point and also to make your day, but unfortunately my phone makes that awful loud noise that goes "ching!!" whenever you snap a picture. I on the other hand, do not want to make her perasan (flatter) by thinking that I admire her boots.

OH EM GEE!!!

Keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding brow

It was my saloon ritual day, so I went to Sim's saloon. Since I have become her "preferred/loyal" customer, she has reduced the price and also given me an extra service. I actually do not know what this "extra service" is called in English, but if u were to look at the picture below, you would go "a ha"!

OK anyway, after blowdrying, diffusing and applying the curl retainer, she (ah I got it, the word!) trimmed my eyebrows using a blade. The blade was new and she was probably in a rush home for dinner, so this happened.

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Come to think of it, I think I recall why she accidentally cut my skin. She was telling this story of how the burglars nowadays are getting bolder. A couple of houses away from hers, a burglary happened. The owner of this burglarised home (Mr X) was not very close to his surrounding neighbours. So, everyday he would leave for work early morning and then come home late at night. He would not mix or even greet his neighbours. Nobody knows how he looks like or whether or not he's got wife or kids (cuz they're kinda like phantoms).

So what happened was, one day, this big-ass truck stopped in front of his house. The other neighbours thought that he was moving away cuz he never told anyone anything. There were like 3 males and 2 females (and even kids!) moving stuff into the lorry. They moved EVERYTHING (including the curtains and rubbish bin). They even had the guts to wave goodbye at this auntie who was perplexedly looking at them.

So when Mr X came home that night, you can literally hear his first word echoing throughout the neighourhood, "Nooooooooooooooooo!!!"